“Punjabi Hindu weddings are loud and indulgent.” Actually? This can be a widespread notion that the world has about them. However I’ve a unique view. Are they a fun-loving race? Sure, however so are most of us. Solely that they’re most likely a bit extra expressive than a number of the different Indian ethnic races. I’ll talk about their wedding ceremony rituals to determine my level.
You’ll by no means discover the temper sombre even at such a solemn event. There’s a dazzling array of colours on show, lovely girls decked up in designer lehenga-cholis and closely embroidered sarees and good-looking gents in sherwanis and costly branded fits.
You’ll additionally discover scintillating show of dancing abilities and fixed train of the vocal chords. The second you set your foot contained in the venue, you’d be greeted with heat and pleasant welcome, candy sounds of laughter and in addition gossip (ahem!) and company flashing million greenback smiles. Not like different Indian marriages, in Punjabi weddings you’d discover even the aged letting their hair down and enthusiastically participating in various kinds of occasions and engagements together with the children. In addition they sing and dance.
There’s melody in music and a whole lot of coronary heart and enjoyable within the dance steps. There’s by no means a boring second. Sure, critics typically name Punjabi weddings ostentatious, gaudy or sexist. However these are discussions for one more day, not applicable for this weblog publish. All I can say is that if you’d like unadulterated, unrestrained enjoyable, you’d discover Punjabi weddings extremely interesting.
Furthermore, movies like Dilwale Dulhaniya Le Jayenge, Mere Dad ki Maruti and a bunch of different Hindi motion pictures have projected Punjabi Hindu Weddings in a manner that at present, Punjabi weddings have develop into synonymous with ‘Indian’ weddings. I imply, that’s how the world often sees it and Punjabi weddings (Hindu) have develop into highly regarded everywhere in the world.
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However all mentioned and executed, the Punjabis are very explicit about upholding their custom they usually attempt to comply with virtually all of the age-old wedding ceremony rituals to a T. There is no such thing as a letup there for anybody. Even the Punjabi immigrants in UK, US, Canada or different Western nations don’t loosen up guidelines for his or her western educated youngsters relating to marriage. Nowadays, nevertheless, Punjabi Weddings provide the very best glimpse of fusion of oriental and occidental values, practices and traditions.
However are you conscious of the names or actual nature of all of the rituals in a Punjabi wedding ceremony? Are we positive concerning the actual order of those occasions? I’ve devoted this publish to offer you a transparent perspective and a short concept concerning the varied rituals.
At the moment, we’re all used to working in an organized method and hopefully having this listing in your hand will assist you to to maintain monitor on the proceedings in the course of the wedding ceremony of your son/daughter or your personal wedding ceremony. Take pleasure in!
Punjabi Hindu Weddings: Pre-wedding rituals
Roka and Thaka
This ritual is the primary in a protracted listing of rituals. Within the first occasion known as Roka or Rokna, the household of the bride visits the household dwelling of the groom with a whole lot of presents. The bride is often not current that day.
This go to is then reciprocated by the groom’s household they usually go to the home of the bride. They carry a whole lot of presents like dry fruits, sweets and savories, jewelries, cash, et al. The couple is taken into account to be formally engaged and they’re made to take a seat collectively and showered with presents known as shagun or sagan. They’re additionally fed laddu. This return ceremony is called Thaka.
This ceremony has all the time been a low-key affair and was initially handled because the date on which the 2 households determined to determine a relationship and repair the date of the marriage. However these days, Roka and Thaka will not be organized individually. Relying on the comfort of each the households and availability of the important thing members from each side, one ceremony is collectively organized.
This ritual often begins with a small puja or prayer known as ardaas to ask for the blessings of God with the intention to safe his blessings and full help and consecrate the start of the journey.
Chunni ceremony marks the official engagement of the to-be-weds. Normally the relations of the groom go to the household of the bride with presents. A pink coloured outfit like a sari or a lehenga-choli is presented to the bride. She can also be gifted a head scarf known as chunni.
The relations of the groom additionally convey jewelries like bangles for the bride and in addition conventional sweets like meva, michri, fruits and mehendi (henna), a sort of dye to be utilized on the arms and toes of the bride. These are thought-about to be presents to the bride coming from the mom of the groom as a token of recognition of her because the fiancée of the groom.
The dupatta or the pinnacle scarf is positioned on the pinnacle of the bride and her face is roofed utilizing it as a veil. This ceremony known as chunni chadana. Then her arms are dyed with mehendi and in addition the bangles are slipped onto her wrists.
The daddy of the groom places meva into the “jholi” or bag of the bride and the dad and mom of the groom additionally give her a date fruit to eat.
Some Punjabi Hindu households ask the groom to place vermilion mark on the brow or hair parting of the bride.
Sagaai or Engagement
Usually on the identical day because the chunni chadhai ceremony, sagaai or engagement ceremony takes place. The bride and the groom trade rings surrounded by their shut family and friends members, thus formally getting accepted to the alternative household. Not like western weddings, no marriage vows or vows of affection are exchanged. Some households contemplate the trade of rings as the ultimate mark of acceptance of the bride coming into the household of the groom and vice versa.
In some Punjabi marriages, the rings are exchanged solely on the finish of the wedding and no separate occasion is organized.
Mehendi Ceremony (Henna)
Mehendi is an indispensable a part of most Indian weddings, which is tough to overlook. It’s one ceremony which each Indian girl – married or single, love. Normally mehendi artists come to the home of the bride a day or two previous to the day of the marriage. They create intricate designs with mehendi on the palm of the arms and toes of the bride. The designs are thoughts blowing. The buddies and sisters of the bride additionally get the gesture prolonged to them. The one factor that the artist and everybody else, ensures is that the designs on others don’t seem like extra ornate than these made on the physique of the bride.
The mehendi ceremony additionally takes place individually on the home of the groom the place the shut feminine relations and relations get their arms and toes dyed for the event.
Usually on the identical night, a girls’ Sangeet is organized the place girls near the bride sing and dance. It’s nothing however a musical extravaganza. It’s fairly much like the bachelorette occasion or hen’s occasion organized within the west to rejoice the final night of the bride as a spinster. The women sing, dance, play musical devices just like the dhol and in addition tease the bride.
In India, historically there has by no means been a ceremony intently resembling the bachelor’s occasion however lately, even the groom and his shut associates rejoice the night earlier than the wedding by collaborating in numerous cultural applications. All of you who’ve had the nice fortune to be part of a Sangeet would know that it’s a night of nice enjoyable and merriment.
Gentle refreshments like various kinds of snacks are served to the company on the finish of the sangeet. However from my private expertise, I can say that the refreshments will not be actually mild. They make up a full course meal. You realize it’s India, proper? And Punjabis are self-avowed foodies!
Kangna Bandhana Ceremony
That is the primary ritual carried out on the morning of the marriage. A sacred thread known as the mouli is tied on the wrist of the bride and the groom individually at their respective houses by a Hindu priest. They should preserve it on their wrist as it’s thought-about to be a good-luck allure and wait till it falls off.
When you translate the nomenclature of this ceremony actually to English, it will be “inserting bangles”. This can be a ceremony which takes place following the kangna bandhana ceremony. A havan or a sacred hearth is lit and the aged male members from the facet of the bride sit across the hearth. The eldest maternal uncle of the bride performs an important function and he additionally takes half within the havan.
The maternal uncle or mama and his spouse would reward a set of 21 bangles – pink/maroon and white/ivory in colour. These days, since ivory is turning into uncommon, brides additionally put on plastic bangles in numerous hues like pink, purple and lots of different colours. However earlier than sliding it onto her wrists, the bangles are blessed by all of the elders current.
The bangles are purified in a liquid combination containing milk and rose petals. The mama has to place the bangles on the wrist of the bride. However the head and face of the bride is roofed with a white scarf at the moment as she shouldn’t be alleged to see the bangles on the time when it’s placed on her wrists. On the time of the ritual, flower petals are showered on the bride.
The mama of the bride additionally presents the bride a lehenga-choli/sari which she wears on the time of the marriage. It’s anticipated that the bride would put on the set of chooda for a minimal interval of 40-45 days.
That is additionally a associated ceremony. The sisters and associates of the bride tie umbrella formed figures known as kalide to the chooda of the bride. They’re pink in colour, a colour which signifies fertility and a cheerful conjugal life and coconut-shaped, signifying prosperity on the dwelling of the newly-weds.
The kalide is commonly encrusted with dried betel nuts, dry fruits or coconut. There’s a advantageous conventional observe of the bride shaking her kalide tied to the chooda worn on her arms and younger single ladies stand beneath it. It’s believed that if part of the kalide or a leaf or a nut or a fruit falls on her head, then she can be the following one to get married.
I feel it’s fairly much like the idea in Christian weddings that if any one of many bridesmaid or a younger single feminine visitor manages to catch the marriage flower of the bride when she throws it into the air after her marriage when she is leaving together with her husband, she can be the following fortunate one to get married!
This ceremony takes place on the morning of the marriage. The bride is sat down dealing with 4 lamps or diyas. This ritual is kind of symbolic. It’s believed that the sunshine emanating from the diyas would all the time preserve the glow or the radiance on the face of the bride. The feminine members of the home would then apply a paste of turmeric, sandalwood, rosewater and mustard oil on the seen elements of the physique of the bride. This paste acts like a scrub or cleaning agent and offers a shine to the face and arms of the bride.
The identical ceremony can also be carried out on the home of the groom and all aged feminine members of his clan apply the paste to the physique of the groom. There’s a whole lot of laughter and enjoyable. Assembled company additionally tease the bride/groom. The women additionally anoint one another’s brow and face with the leftover paste. The younger single girls and boys additionally run-around and apply the paste on one another’s face hoping to get married.
This instantly follows the haldi ceremony. After the haldi is scrubbed off from the physique of the bride, she accompanies her siblings and shut associates to a close-by temple. A pitcher stuffed with holy water is then poured on her. After this, she enters the internal sanctum of the temple and prays to the reigning deity of the temple and asks for His/Her blessings. She then comes again to her dwelling and takes a full and correct bathe and begins preparing for the primary occasions of the night.
Ghara Ghardoli additionally takes place on the residence of the groom. In his case, nevertheless, his sister-in-law often pours the pitcher stuffed with water on him and he often doesn’t want to go to a temple. After he returns from the bathe, he’s given a regal, resplendent gown to put on within the night.
After the groom is prepared, he has to face in entrance of the household deities and a small puja is carried out by the priest. Puja of a pink coloured turban or headgear known as sehra is finished by the priest and it’s then wrapped across the head of the bridegroom by his father or a really senior male member. The sehra has strings hanging down which ought to partially cowl the face of the groom as he wears it. After the sehrabandi, the bride and his motorcade or his cavalcade is able to depart for the marriage venue.
Ghodi Sajana and Ghodi Chadna
It has been a long-standing observe for the groom to trip a caparisoned mare when going to the bride’s home or wedding ceremony venue to get married. Ghodi chadna is the ceremony the place the groom will get up on the again of the horse to go away. However earlier than he units out, the mare or the ghodi is decked up. It’s also fed by the sisters and feminine cousins of the groom and in addition given water to drink. This is called ghodi sajana.
The sister-in-law of the groom places surma, a black powdery merchandise, in his eyes with the intention to push back any form of evil presence from his life in addition to to make his journey protected.
This roughly ends the pre-wedding rituals. Because the groom and his retinue are on their manner, the bride is preparing too. She wears a closely embroidered saree or a crystal encrusted lehenga with choli. Three or 4 heavy necklaces, a gold or diamond nostril ring, anklets and matching earrings full the appears of the bride. She can also be given a correct bridal make-up by knowledgeable make-up artist and in addition a pleasant hairdo by a stylist.
The aged male family members of the bride additionally oversee the final minute preparations and stand in a queue on the entrance of the venue, ready for the arrival of the baraat.
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Punjabi Hindu Weddings: Marriage ceremony rituals
Agwaani and Milni
That is the ritual which marks the arrival of the groom on his horse along with his procession in tow. They’re welcomed on the entrance by the relations of the bride. Punjabis are loquacious and love making new acquaintances. They’re typically very heat too. So when the 2 teams meet, a whole lot of love and heat is exuded and exchanged. It’s common for the relations from each side to hug one another and in addition shake arms. This ritual known as agwaani.
The groom is specifically welcomed by the mom of the bride in a standard Indian welcome which incorporates aarti, that’s worshiping him with a lighted lamp and is led inside. Every of his relative meets and is greeted by the corresponding relative from the facet of the bride. Which means that the maternal uncle of the groom meets the maternal uncle of the bride, the paternal uncles from each side converge and so forth and so forth. This coming collectively is noticed as milni.
Varmala or Jaimala
After the groom enters the marriage corridor, he’s led to an elevated stand. On the sacred mahurat, the bride too walks in and will get up on the stand. Tthe bride and the groom then trade garlands.
Throughout this ceremony, there may be a whole lot of pleasure and hoopla. The groom is repeatedly egged on by his siblings and associates to not decrease his head in order that the bride has to work additional exhausting to achieve him.
Madhuperk or Madhuperka
This can be a very previous vedic custom. After the trade of the garlands, the bride and the groom sit across the sacred hearth. The bride would first give the groom a small bowl of water. He sprinkles some water first on his toes, then his physique and ultimately drinks the remaining.
After this, the groom is given a sherbet known as madhuperk, made from clarified butter or ghee, curd, honey and a few essence to drink. He takes it and sprinkles some in all instructions earlier than slowly sipping on it.
This ceremony is symbolic and really touching. The daddy of the bride arms over the bride to the groom and entreats him to take excellent care of her. He tells him that he has introduced her up with a lot love and care and expects the groom to offer her equal love and respect and deal with her happiness all the time.
He additionally advises his daughter to like her new household and take excellent care of her husband. She ought to all the time ask for his permission earlier than doing one thing and in addition dedicate her life for the progress of her new family tree.
After this, the marriage havan is lit and 14 parallel traces of flour is made on a plate and saved in entrance of the groom. A flower bud is saved atop it. The 14 traces symbolize 14 wedding ceremony vows that the groom has to satisfy all by means of his life. The priest chants mantras and the priest tells the groom one vow at a time and exhorts him to satisfy it along with his life. He has to take the vow and erase one line at a time with that flower bud.
The couple now has to circle the sacred hearth 4 occasions. For the primary three rounds, the bride leads from the entrance adopted intently by the groom. The top of the headband worn by the groom is tied to the tip of the saree or the lehenga worn by the bride.
The bride is taken into account to be an incarnation of Goddess Laxmi, the Goddess of wealth and prosperity and the bride is believed to convey the household she would quickly develop into part of, prosperity and happiness by means of her measured actions and calm presence of thoughts.
The order adjustments within the final phera and the groom goes within the entrance. After the final phera, the couple is asserted married by the priest. The Hearth God or Agni is believed to solemnize the marriage Himself by being the witness of this act.
This can be a sacrificial ceremony. The youthful brother of the bride takes rice flakes in his arms. The bride varieties a cup with the palm of her arms and the groom places his cupped arms beneath her arms. The brother of the bride then places the rice flakes within the cup and the couple provides it to the Hearth God and search his blessings. Lajahom is repeated thrice.
Lajahom marks the completion of the Vedic wedding ceremony rituals. After this, an important ritual known as sindoor daan is carried out. The groom anoints the brow of the bride and fills her hair parting with vermillion.
This signifies the tip of the wedding ceremony and the start of a brand new relationship between the couple. This bond is believed to final ceaselessly. Since Hindus imagine within the idea of rebirth/ a number of births, it’s believed that when a pair ties the knot, they get sure forever-even within the subsequent lives.
A rationalist may query the premise of such a perception however that’s how it’s. A quite common saying in Hindi is “Janma janmantar ka saath”- this could offer you an concept how useful a wedding is to Hindus.
This isn’t precisely a ritual within the strict sense of the time period. However it’s an previous custom that’s nonetheless adopted in most North Indian weddings.
Clearly, the groom has to come back to the marriage venue sporting a specific shoe. However earlier than stepping on the podium, he has to take off his footwear. And naturally, the rituals take a while to finish. Throughout that interval, the footwear are left unguarded.
This offers the best alternative to the sisters and cousins of the bride to take away it from the spot and conceal it. After the marriage, when the groom comes down, he finds his footwear lacking. What follows subsequent is hilarious. The cousins and sisters of the bride begin negotiating with the groom, his brothers and associates to offer an appropriate ransom for the discharge of the ‘kidnapped’ pair of footwear. The groom lastly relents to finish his ‘trauma’. The ‘kidnappers’ usually ask for gold kalecharis for the sisters of the bride and silver kalecharis for her cousins.
After this the company, particularly the baraat are served a lavish dinner. Meals at a Punjabi wedding ceremony is among the excessive factors. It might be strictly vegetarian or can have a mixture of each veg and non-veg objects. There are sometimes a number of cuisines, dwell counters and separate stalls serving totally different sorts of tasty meals.
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Punjabi Hindu Weddings: Put up-wedding rituals
This can be a typical Hindu bridal send-off ceremony. It’s a lovely custom. On the next day of the wedding, it’s time for the bride to bid farewell to her family- dad and mom, siblings, kins and buddies. It’s a very poignant and touching second. The bride takes phulian or puffed rice in her arms and with out turning again, throws them over her head backwards within the course of her household.
That is how the bride thanks her household for caring for her hitherto and in addition throwing of puffed rice signifies the hope that there can be eternal prosperity on the home.
The brothers and male cousins of the bride lead her to the automobile the place her husband is already ready to take her to his abode. The return procession known as the doli and the mom of the groom and another aged feminine relations arrive earlier than the doli leaves.
They’ve to achieve the groom’s home and make preparations for receiving the newly-wed couple.
That is the primary of the post-wedding rituals that happen on the dwelling of the groom. The mother-in-law has to use mustard oil on each side of the doorway door and await the doli to reach. As soon as they arrive, the mom of the groom does an aarti of the bride with a pitcher of water. After finishing every circle of the aarti, the mom tries to drink the water however each time the bride stops her. She would enable her mother-in-law to drink the water solely on the seventh rely. After that, the bride has to overturn a container of rice together with her toes and in addition depart an impression of her lac-dyed toes on a white fabric.
She is then welcomed in and led to the room containing figures and pictures of Gods and Goddesses. The couple first seeks their blessings after which the bride is made to take a seat down in order that she will be able to get acquainted together with her new relations.
Mooh Dikhai ki Rasm
Actually translated this implies, the face of the brand new bride is revealed to the relations and neighbors for the primary time. She lifts her veil and begins interacting with the assembled company freely. That is how they break the ice.
The mother-in-law bestows a whole lot of presents and jewelries on the brand new bride and different elders additionally bless her and provides her presents.
After this often the bride returns to her parental dwelling for a day accompanied by her husband and the couple spends the night time. The next morning she returns to the house of her in-laws with a whole lot of presents.
Grand Reception Social gathering
This can be a occasion thrown in honor of the newly-weds by the household of the groom. It’s a lavish, grandiose affair and company are invited who come and meet the couple and still have a whole lot of enjoyable. These days, reducing and serving bridal truffles and champagne are fairly widespread. This concept has been borrowed from the West. Elaborate dance and music preparations are additionally made. The couple hit the dance ground together with the invited company. It’s a night time of enjoyable and hoopla. Quite a lot of hullabaloo is made (all in jest, thoughts you). The kids and the aged obliterate the age distinction for that day and boogie down collectively. You’ll steadily discover pelvic thrusts and gyrations and joyful laughter.
This often marks the tip of an ‘eventful’ wedding ceremony ceremony. A Punjabi Hindu wedding ceremony will depart you mesmerized by its splendor and humbled & touched by its easy however deeply symbolic and philosophical rituals.
Hope I’ve been in a position to create a complete listing which is not going to solely inform you but additionally information you you probably have a marriage within the household within the close to future!
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